City Crawler Goes To School

A lot of people think that the work I do is borne out of passion. Well that is correct. But I also had a beautiful foundation. I studied literature under Mr shina badaru in JSS2 and he made me love the subject so so much. I proceeded to study Theatre Arts in the Prestigious Theatre Arts Department (the best) of the University of Calabar. My teachers, Prof Kalu Uka, Dr Iji. Dr Enendu and Mr Orok, for 4 years schooled me THOROUGHLY and built up my passion to what it is today, a full blown career in the Media and Public Relations. But this story is not my Autobiography, its about an incident that happened one day in the premises of the University.

If you went to a University like mine, you will know that student were divided into 3 parts, Cool Crowd, Efficos and SU. Of course we all know what the ‘Cool Crowd’ means but for the sake of my foreign readers, ‘Efficos’ were the bookworms, night class, tie and suit wearing students. They usually made Class Rep and SUG(student union) Presidents. ‘SU’ were Scripture Union , this were the scarf tying, bible carrying, fellowship attending students. There were other categories, but my story today is about an Effico.

One morning, I got to school quite early. As I got off the bike at the bike stand, I heard a racket and edged closer to find out. A student (Effico) dressed in chinos trousers, stripped shirt and an awkwardly short tie was engaged in an argument with a Bike man aka Alalok(in Calabar) and Okada(in lagos).

*Bike man – it is N40 from orok orok junction to library…..
*Effico – How? Abeg take your N30 jo (at this point Effico turns to an onlooker and starts explaining the situation. Then point to the bike man and says)
‘Look at this individual’!
(The bike man is suddenly enraged, gets off his bike, swings it aside and hold the Effico by the throat and screams at him ) *‘ama kod eyen individual’ – translation – you called me individual???

Poor uneducated bike man, heard the big word, individual, and felt it was an insult. The whole misunderstanding was queeled and we dispersed to our classes. I have never forgotten that day and I tell that joke to my friends all the time and I am always assured a roar of laughter.

Its not just this joke I learnt during my time in Calabar, I do a very good Ibibio/efik impression and imitation and cos of this all my friends think I’m funny. I also have friends that make me laugh anytime they open their mouth to say something – good, bad, yab or even dirty. They are just so hilarious. Bill, Inieke, Jude, Ukeme, Gbenga, Ulabi, Muji, Farrah,Gang, Onoja, Tony, Kola, Audu, Q – for some reason they could be on stage performing, but they have day jobs.

So do have experiences from your time in school, from working with hilarious colleagues or living in a disfuntional household (I mean this is the fondest of ways) that you will like to share? Come Sunday the 7th of February, you will have an opportunity. White Rabbit Concept is introducing a fresh new concept “COMEDY KARAOKE ‘ . If you think you are funny, if you’ve got jokes then this is a perfect relaxation for you. It works like actual karaoke but in this case, you will be cracking jokes not singing (feel free to sing though). There will be an in-house comedian to get u in the mood and prizes for everyone who participates. A lil bird told me they have a blackberry to give out to the best joke of the evening.

This Concept was created to fill an existing gap in Abuja social culture; we always complain of same ol’ same ol’. Well this is something different and it is family friendly. So bring your mama, your papa, your husband your wives , your boss, your colleagues and come relax and even network on a Sunday evening. Who knows, I might get on stage and give the bike man joke, believe me, it’s funnier when you hear it……


Kisses every 1 and see you Sunday.